Shiva: Are you pro-choice or pro-life?

Ivan: Pro-choice

Shiva: Do you think global warming is real?

Ivan: Absolutely

Shiva: Perfect. Now if you were a CEO, would you ever outsource jobs to poor countries to exploit cheap labour?

Ivan: I would never engage in anything that undermines the strength of the common worker.

Shiva: Very good. So how do you feel about George W. Bush?

Ivan: Negatively

Shiva: And what’s your take on evolution?

Ivan: The scientific evidence is overwhelming.

Shiva: Good good. Do you believe man landed on the moon?

Ivan: Of course.

Shiva: Now complete the following sentence: “Then why did I have the ____ Bart? Why did I have the _____?”

Ivan: I…I…….I don’t know

Shiva: And to think………….I almost loved you